Are They A True Friend?

Hey Everyone, 

I hope you are all doing fantastically well today. 

Recently someone close to me told me how they were feeling lonely, down and left out with their friends. They told me how they had taken to Tinder to try find a boy so that they didn't feel alone anymore and that they might be able to hang out with their friends again with that boy. Now whilst I don't have anything against Tinder.... I don't believe in having to change yourself or have a boyfriend/girlfriend or do stuff to please others so that you feel more included and get invites to hang out etc..

Over the years we all change as a person... and that is a really good process - and normal. So, with that in mind there is no surprise that we change our friends and the people we want to surround ourselves with because we get on better with them and have the same morals and values etc. It is okay to change friends... just because you met them in school or when you were an itsy bitsy kid doesn't mean you are stuck with them for life. It only takes one person to make you feel less alone in this massive world be it a partner or friend. No matter what is going on in their life, if they care about you and want you in their life they will make time for you. Having a boyfriend or a busy job is no excuse because we as people have a choice to do what we want and see who we want. 

There is a quote that I always see floating around that says 'Anyone can love you when the sun is shining. In the storm is where you find out who truly cares', and it is so true. Friendships/relationships aren't about being there for all the good times in one another's lives, it is about being there when it is not so convenient to be there because things are harder and not so great. We don't lose friends in life... we simply find out who our true friends are. We shouldn't have to change ourselves or hide the hard things in our lives from

them or do things we don't want to do just to feel included or wanted or less alone. We should be able to be ourselves ... because being yourself is the most beautiful thing. If we were all the exact same life would be so boring and we probably wouldn't be all that happy. We are all different and therefore get on better with different people. Being different is awesome and we have to accept that. At school I would think that I needed to be like the 'popular, pretty girl' because I thought that would get me more friends and make me happy. Did it? NOPE..... for the short time I was friendly with that girl, I couldn't be myself because our personalities were so different and the 'friends' that came with that didn't make me feel any less alone... in fact I probably felt more alone because I just didn't fit in with that. We don't need 100 friends or the same friends as we've had for years ... we only need 1 person to feel less alone, accepted and happy. 

In school we have no choice but to be around certain people all day everyday which is why we don't talk to even half the people we used to once we leave. Once we leave school (or anywhere.. work... activities.. anything), we get to choose who we hang out with and we get to see who we genuinely get on well with and more importantly, who GENUINELY wants us in their lives and is there for us no matter what life throws at us. Just because they now have a boyfriend, does that mean they now don't ever want to hang with you because they're with them? Just because they got some new job, does that mean they don't want to know you? No! Change is scary but so rewarding.

So, if you feel alone, go make new BETTER...REAL friends. Be yourself and you'll make friends who love you for you and will bet there no matter what. Real friends can make good days better and bad days less hard and still make you laugh even when you just don't want to. A friend tells you what they think you want to hear, a true friend tells you how it is and then helps make it better. Life is a rollercoaster and no matter how amazing our lives are, we will still experience hard times and we are able to choose who we surround ourselves with to make us happy and help us get through the hard times... they shouldn't be the ones putting us through the hard times though. Don't get me wrong, no relationship is perfect and all has the tough times... but the ones that pull through it and are stronger for it will go so much further. Remember to always communicate with people about how you feel.

Remember, you do you because that is the most beautiful thing ever and by being you, you will find people to surround yourself with that make you feel less alone in this huge world and who will help us through the hard times. Never change yourself or pretend to be someone else to feel accepted. I know it is hard especially with the media these days... but honestly, you will be sooooo much happier.

Have you ever experienced this or know someone who did? Let's support one another and spread some love. Check out my social media and let's all chat and help each other to feel happy and less alone. Lets encourage people to be themselves and no-one else! I also made a video on this so go head over to my Youtube channel if you fancy watching that... or anything else! www.youtube.com/thedramaqueensoph

Have a lovely day and I shall speak to you all soon :) 
Stay Strong
<3